Never
by FluffleNeCharka
Summary: Lili reflects on her unorthodox relationship with Sasha. Oneshot, SashaLili


Title: Never

Type: Oneshot (most of my fics are, for some reason…)

Rating: T for one swearword

Pairing: Sasha Nein and Lili Zanotto

Disclaimer: I have nothing! NOTHING! sobs I-I'll be okay… I just need time… I OWN NOTHING! WAAAAH!

Warnings: Contains one swearword, Raz cheating on Lili (although he DID apologize for it) and of course Lili and Sasha being in love when it's not totally legal there a twenty year or more age difference. If you take issue with any of the above, please do not flame me. If you choose to ignore this warning and flame me anyway, please spell check and such so that I can understand what you are saying.

Lili had never met anyone like Sasha.

Her whole life was a monotone routine. Every year, she'd be shifted between boarding school and summer camps. So much so that, by age six, home was an empty, hollow word with little meaning. The words mother and father soon followed. Everyone had always assumed that, being daughter of the Grand Head of the Psychonauts, she was snobby. The word friend was added onto the list. Yes, she had a list of words she didn't like. She kept it inside her suitcase, some words written messily in crayon, some in smudged gel pens from when she was younger, the newer ones written in scrawling crimson words with a black and gold calligraphy pen Sasha had given her during her first summer at Whispering Rock. Bobby had taken her pencils and crayons. With a little pyrokinesis, though, the revenge was worth it. Hot wax all over his hair, and burning pencils stuck into shoulders.

Milla had taken her aside for a gentle scolding, but Lili's light brown eyes weren't focused on her. They focused instead on Sasha Nein, who was laughing quietly at what she'd done. He'd stopped at Milla's glare, but the amused grin never left his face as he walked off, chortling. The next day, when Lili was meditating over a particularly odd black rose under Sasha's GPC, the older Psychonaut had interrupted her, handing her a very expensive looking calligraphy pen and a bottle of dark red ink via telekinesis.

"It's non-flammable," he smirked, and she grinned. She was only seven. Glancing curiously at the flower she was meditating over, he raised an eyebrow. Her cheeks turned orange. "Ah, you have exquisite taste, Miss Zanotto. Roses have the ability to clear many psychics' minds of hostile thoughts. Just make sure you don't touch it."

Lili had stared after him long after he'd gone back into his lab. Then she turned the inkbottle and pen over in her hands again and again. She'd never gotten a gift before. Never. Milla gave Lili a card on her birthday, of course, but that was it. Her father sent her money… But a true gift, something someone had gone out of the way to think about… Wow. Lili smiled to herself. She'd never met anyone who thought she was important enough to do that kind of thing for.

Sasha wasn't a normal instructor. He proved that much when he blasted the wall an inch from Benny's head and muttered, "Ah, an inch too far to the left. I must be slipping, the last child I hit went into a coma…" Or when he showed her the best places in the woods for finding rare flowers to meditate over. She liked him. He actually spent time with her, not ever mentioning her father. That was what set him apart from Oleander in her mind. Coach Oleander wanted a promotion in a bad, greedy sort of way. To Sasha Nein, parents were a nasty topic to be avoided.

She never understood why until her second summer, when, to her shock and amazement, he confided in her that his mother had died early on and that his father had booted him out of their home when he was only twelve. Lili had hugged him, an act that caused the German Psychonaut to freeze up. That saddened her for some weird, unidentifiable reason, but the fact that he had told her and hadn't shoved her away meant a lot to her.

Sasha didn't see her the way other people did. They saw her as either Lili, the snobby tough girl, or Lili Zanotto, the possible promotion. Sasha saw her as Lillianna Carol Zanotto, the kid who just needed someone mature to hang out with. Lillianna, the girl he could always trust to keep a secret, the girl he respected enough not to object when she dated Elton even though they clearly wouldn't work.

When Raz cheated on her, she understood. And the way he apologized, so earnestly and honestly, looking truly sorry, she knew that Raz must've really loved whoever he'd fallen for. So she did what any caring girlfriend would do. She let him go. She wanted him to be happy, after all; he was a good friend. But it didn't stop a part of her heart from breaking. Lili didn't cry. She was above that. She didn't bitch and whine about it to anyone, either. It didn't matter – Sasha knew, somehow, that she needed cheering up.

He took her to an amusement park, which was a totally new experience for her. Lili squealed when Sasha said, "Tonight is your night. I'll do anything you want."

They'd gone on every single ride there, and Lili had eaten so much food she thought she was going to be sick. The night was a flurry of activity, fun and at the end, fireworks. Lili had even gotten Sasha to smile, and not his usual sarcastic grin, either, but a full on, genuine little smile that suited him well. At the end of the night, she'd hugged him. Maybe it was something in the way he'd hugged her back, but she had sensed something was different about their bond after that. Something unfathomable had changed, ever so slightly.

Three monthes later Sasha had told her he loved her.

Lili had never seen him look so defeated. His sunglasses removed, his shoulders lowered, looking as though he was on the verge of tears, she realized with a shock how much he meant to her. Sasha was the only one she could depend on to be loyal to her. He'd ignored his feelings so she could date Elton and, later on, Raz. She knew how hard it was to just shove aside love like that. It felt like her heart had been ripped out for about a month. And not only had he done that twice, but he'd had to deal hers and Raz's public display of affection.

So with an impish smile she told him she loved him back. It was a beautiful, cherished moment for both Psychonauts. Then, the most amazing thing happened. Sasha cried. Lili had never seen a guy cry before, except Dogen. With a smile, she cuddled into him and wiped away his tears. Yeah, she'd never met anyone like Sasha.

Authors Notes: This was done was hearing a friend of mine sing a totally heartfelt song he wrote called 'Never'. It was basically about how he'd never met anyone like his girlfriend, and how he'd never leave her. I won't say who he dedicated it to, but suffice it to say he must really be in love because the song sure as heck inspired me.


End file.
